Patient Files
by Shazzie
Summary: When a madman strikes, it's not just Jane that's left in pieces. And it's up to a psychologist that has to gain the trust of four cut off, suspicious team members, a teenager that has a beyond skewed view of the world and the Red John suspects to get to the truth. But will the truth really help? I own nothing, and there is some strong language in this. Reviews are really apreciated
1. Chapter 1

Patient Files.

PATIENT NUMBER:00489

NAME: SWALLOW ,RYLAN

DATE: 14/6/13

PSYCHOLOGIST : DR.

**PACIENT PHYCHOLOGY REPORT**

_Mr Rylan Swallow (19 years of age, unmarried, no children) is a newly admitted patient with no history of any mental illnesses, family history or otherwise. He was admitted due to an incident involving a male in his late 30's, leaving the male with locked in syndrome. Although the cause of the attack is not known, Mr Swallow was admitted after several videos were uncovered with concerning evidence of mental instability. _

_In our first session, he was cold, distant. Fiddling with his fingers, he was clearly uncomfortable. In the process of talking to him, I have deduced that he has extraordinarily low self esteem levels. He spoke about how he was "_always the biggest and the strongest in a group of people" _but at the same time _"would be beaten my their words, every day, because the words hurt so much more than a pair of fists". _It is clear that, although he is in poor mental health and will need immediate counselling frequently. I have also identified him as a suicide risk._

_My next session with Mr Swallow will be on the 15__th__ of this month- tomorrow- in which I hope to show him that he is in a safe environment and is free to talk to me._

* * *

It's crazy really. Crazy when you think about it. I didn't really do much, just followed orders.

And now I'm in a hospital for the criminally insane.

Crazy.

And that's a little bit of irony for you. I'm not crazy, I swear. But this place is. I've been locked in a crazy house with insane people.

I'm not some nut you know. I'm not a terrorist, I don't think that all of these people are perfectly sane, because they're clearly not. When you walk along the corridors- which I'm not aloud to do anymore, thanks to that fucked doctor of mine- and hear the things they scream, the way they're afraid. When you see them cradling themselves like a five year old who's just scraped their knee, rocking, calling for their mummies. It's pitiful really. But it really says something. Rather than putting these people in a nice place with care, they shove them in a "hospital" with white robs and dose them up, dose us up, on crap that druggies would love to get their hands on.

Have you ever seen that film, house on the hunted hill?

It's kind of like that. Nurses that don't care, crazy people that break things and scream and fight, moaning and groaning like zombies from a clichéd movie about brain eating. We even have our own crazy doctor.

Except, without the cutting and the experiments and the crazy ass cool stuff.

But I guess I get why I'm here.

I followed the orders of a crazy man.

Don't get me wrong, the crazy man is brilliant, a genius in reality. Aren't all brilliant people crazy?

He told me to kill a man. So I did- or at least, I tried. A man with no worth, a man that wouldn't put up a fight.

A man who had nothing to live for.

Patrick Jane.

So I ran him down. I killed my father and when the "CBI" came to investigate, I got in my car and I went for him. Nothing anyone could do but watch as I did my best to maim, torture, murder their colleague. Their friend.

I don't regret it. Never. He deserved to die. The two minutes I spent with the guy told me that. The pompous ass hole deserved to be dead, deserved to be dead for the things he said, the things he did, the way he looked and the way he spoke.

Regrets are for fools.

But I do feel a little sorry for that agent lady, the small one with the green eyes and the blackish hair.

Stunning green eyes.

The look on her face when I did it. The way she ran faster than anyone else to the dick's side. The way she moved first.

But I do not regret it.

And I won't be in this place for long. Red John will get me out.

Red John _will _get me out.

* * *

The slow thundering of the heart rate monitor. The quiet chatter of the people passing the door every now and again. I heard it all.

And yet I couldn't move.

I could hear her shuddering breaths, the tears she was keeping quiet, the rustle of her clothes as she rubbed her arm. And then I felt her hand, against mine, squeezing it. My side hurt, fire was cursing through my veins. My head was a blazing pit of agony, the pain never seeming to end.

But none of that mattered.

Not now.

Why couldn't I move?

Why couldn't I open my eyes, why couldn't I look at Lisbon, at the beauty that is her. Why couldn't I take her into my arms, stop the tears from flowing down her face?

And then I heard her slow murmurs, her hand lifting mine to her face, her mouth against it, kissing it gently. She rested her head against it.

"Please, come back to me Jane. Please"

I will Lisbon. Please. Please hear me scream. Please, hear my words.

Please let me come back.

**Author's Note- That was a little crazy to write… I've never written anything like this before, so I really would appreciate feedback. Do you want me to carry on? This is a really short chapter, but I haven't written anything in ages and it's enough to get me started, so if you like it the rest of the chapters will all probably be longer. I'm in the middle of writing the second chapter now, so if you all do I'll hopefully have that up in a few days but it depends on how much homework and coursework my teachers decide to give me *pulls a face***

**So thank you for reading it :)**


	2. Chapter 2

Patient Files- Chapter Two.

She couldn't believe how fast it'd happened. One minute she was laughing inwardly at him, rolling her eyes at the ridiculous comments that he seemed incapable of holding in, and the next…

Just like that.

Boom.

Done.

She was on the floor. Besides him.

Trying to find a heartbeat. Trying to find a tremor of life. Trying to find hope.

But none was left.

She sat there, now, next to him again. Her eye lids were heavy from the lack of sleep, but she couldn't close them. She couldn't close them because when she did, she would dream. When she did she would see it all again, feel it all again. Feel his last smile, feel the gush of air blow onto her neck as he pushed her out of the way, out of the way of that car.

She would feel his last heartbeats. She would feel his last moments. She would feel him die.

And then it would become real.

She could pretend, for now. She could fool herself into thinking that none of it was true, that it had all been a dream.

But once she woke up, she would have to face it.

He was dying. In front of her, locked inside of his own mind, locked inside of his own soul.

She felt the warm trickle of a tear drop running down the side of her cheek, and for the first time since her father died, she let it fall. But only one.

Because she couldn't cry.

Through all that she had been through, she knew that. She knew you couldn't cry because it wouldn't change things, it wouldn't help. She had to be there for others, she could never put herself first.

Never.

She lifted her head and saw him, saw the machinery that was keeping him alive, saw the shell of his old self.

She saw the car, speeding, tumbling into them.

She lifted her head and she saw him die.

* * *

PATIENT NUMBER: 00489

NAME: SWALLOW, RYLAN

DATE: 15/10/13

PHYSCHOLOGIST: DR. BRASS

_Today was my second session with Mr. Swallow, who has now asked of me to call him Rylan. From today's session, I can see that Rylan is not mentally instable, but a teenage boy who has been driven over the edge by his intelligence and knowledge of the world and current events. Although he has not yet told me why he attacked Patrick Jane with a car, it is clear to me that there was obvious reasoning behind it and that it was not an impulsive decision, but one that had months of planning and preparation with a lot of careful decision making. _

_He spoke today about how the society is being muddled by the rules constricting law enforcement officers, claiming that this prevents any realistic law and order from taking place. The following is a quote from out session, something he said that gave me "the chills"._

"I'm not a maniac. But I'm here. You're a psychologist, right? Then you can see, I'm perfectly sane. Someone needed to show the world how fucked up they've gotten. I wouldn't have done it you know, if the man had just followed the rules. If he had just kept his gob shut, no one would have even noticed him and his wife and kid would still be alive. That's what needed to be done, showing people that there is a price to pay. A picture speaks a thousand words right? Well a word is the same as a thousand knives. It will always come back to hit you, whether you're saying good or bad will decide your fait. People have forgotten that now. Forgotten how to keep to themselves. Everyone wants to be on TV, everyone wants to be famous. Fame comes with a price and these bitches are going to be dragged down for their vanity. For the fact they do jack shit and are paid to sit around on their lazy asses and smile for a freaking camera. We can all do that. But it's the ones that forget their morals, forget the code of humanity that do and they're the ones who'll end up dead, believe you me."

_As you can see, this is extremely obscene of Rylan, and he appears to be talking about the "lack of decency" that many celebrities are viewed of having in the modern day. This appears to be one of the things that drove him to the attempted murder of Mr Jane, and he is now a suspect in the murders of his father as well as Mr Jane's wife and daughter, Angela and Charlotte, although I do not believe he is capable of Ms and Miss Jane's murders as he was only nine years of age at the time of their demise. _

_One note to make, about the speech he made on celebrities. It was moving, the way he said it. Although it is virtually totally disputable, the scary thing it…. I kind of agree…_

* * *

This is Doctor Hensworth, preparing to sign out. I have been Patrick Jane's doctor for the past few days ,and his condition is only worsening. The woman who stays with him, although I do not believe is a relative or spouse, appears to be our best chance at bringing him back to us, out of this condition.

Patrick Jane has been the victim of a rare mental disorder, locked in syndrome, due to heavy brain damage after a car crash at approximately 09:46 on Friday 11th October 2013. He also suffered from heavy blood loss, and his prognosis was not good.

Though he has made extreme physical improvement, there has been a much slower much more limited time scale in which his mental health has improved. When I say mental health of course, I mean neurological health, not his sanity. However, from what we have seen he is fighting, with periods of elevated brain activity we are almost positive that he can hear us and is fighting to wake.

As I previously mentioned, I believe Agent Lisbon, the woman staying with him, is out best hope of bringing him back. He has previously been in a fugue state, from which Agent Lisbon awoke him by taking him to his home in Malibu. We will be referring a specialist to his case in a few days to attempt to awaken him, working with the people he was closest to to see if there are any neurological triggers that could awaken him.

I will be returning in the early hours of the morning, and have every intention of going over all of his info to see if there is a piece of documentation that could help us with the awakening of Patrick Jane.

Doctor Hensworth, Signing Out.

* * *

**Author's note- Thankyou to everyone who reviewed the last chapter :) That includes all of the guests, if you have profiles I would love it if you would sign in so I could thank you all personally. I really hoped you enjoyed this chapter (and the quick update). I haven't started chapter 3 yet, but I'm hoping to start it tomorrow night and have it finished by lunchtime on Saturday (English Time). Thankyou for reading it! **


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